Dating brother's buddy

Posted By ROBIN ANDERSON

Posted 2 months ago

Dear Robin:Recently I started dating one of my brother's friends and my brother doesn't like it at all. This guy is 20 and I'm 16. We really like each other and I don't understand why my brother is mad at me. He always said that my happiness is important. Is there anything I can do to make this less hard on him? -- YOUNG HEART

Dear Young Heart:Have you tried asked him why he is so upset about it in the first place? Maybe he knows things about this friend, and doesn't like him dating his little sister. It could simply be because you are his sister and he cares about you, period. I don't know too many big brothers who are happy with another guy -- any guy -- putting the moves on their little sister. It could also be uncomfortable for all involved if you two broke up, and possibly hurt their friendship. Find out what his issue is, and if you really like this boy, tell him that.

Dear Robin:I've been thinking a lot lately about equality in relationships. Based on observing my friends, it seems to me that it always makes a difference when one partner makes a significant amount more than the other. When it's the men making less, they seem to hate it while the women get embarrassed about it, and when it's the reverse, the man always seems to be in control of everything. Have you seen this in your experience? How can two partners navigate a relationship without money being an issue? --MONEY MATTERS

Dear Money Matters:All a couple can do is discuss all the issues before marriage -- including what will be done should problems arise -- and come to some kind of compromise, so there is a solid foundation to build on, and it doesn't turn into a war of wills later. Sometimes it isn't a matter of control at all, but a matter of who is better at handling the money.

Robin Anderson is the winner of Sun Media's National Advice Competition. Mail your questions to advice@sunmedia.ca.